If you have read Ari’s history you know that her family was killed during a drow house-war. Ari believed she was the only survivor until she learned that her brother, Jax, had survived. Better yet, he was working with a group known as the Dark Stalkers near Jurgenville. Ari set up a meeting with him. It didn’t go the way she planned, but it was still an interesting conversation. The formatting is a little strange since this was cobbled together from various e-mails.

From you I think the main thing is we need to get the conversation

with Jax done. Do you go down alone or do you want Valdaeron to come

with you? If you go down alone, you are taken to a small but

comfortable room (looks like some kind of common area for the miners)

and asked to wait. About 10 minutes later Jax is escorted in. He

sits down across from you but doesn't look directly at you. Several

emotions race across his face. You think you see anger, fear, and

confusion.

Ari, alone, waits for her brother to arrive. It's been so many years and she tries to picture what he must look like now. Would he look like their father?

When he walks into the room her eyes greedily scan his face, drinking in everything. She can not speak, her brain suddenly emptying of all thought. Her most fondest desire at this very moment is to fling herself into her older brother's arms and tell him how much she misses him and that she is glad she isn't alone anymore.

But it is not to be. She sees that in his face.

Ari keeps her voice quiet, soft. She fights to keep it from trembling.

"Will you not look at me? It's been over fifty years Jax."

Jax looks at you, but then just as quickly looks away, various

emotions flashing across his face.

Of its own volition her hand starts to cross the open space of the table to reach for his. She pulls it back abruptly. "I.." She clears her throat and tries again. "I have always wondered if you survived. I did not see you that day. I looked." Looking down at her hands, "I'm happy to see you. Happy to see that you have found a place for yourself, as I have."

"Ah, so that is what it is. You have "found a place". You are

"happy" now. Cuddled deep in the arms of our most hated enemy!"

Speaking out like this seems to free whatever restraints where holding

Jax back. He turns on you, his lip pulled up in a sneer. "Such a

good little cleric, such a noble little cleric. How COULD you, Ari?

I knew that you were always warped somewhat, what with all those

stupid animals you kept bringing home and nursing back to health. But

this? THIS?"

Jax pauses, shaking his head as if he still doesn't believe it. He

looks up at you once more, this time looking at your chest - at the

crescent moon symbol that hangs there. The warrior takes a few deep

breaths and then continues.

"It was about a year ago that rumors started trickling down, rumors

about a drow priestess which had joined up with a surface adventuring

company. We all talked about it, of course. Many of those in the

Stalkers had fled from priestesses for one reason or another. After

we were reassured that it wasn't a priestess trying to hunt one of us

down we thought it rather interesting that a drow priestess would come

up to the surface to adventure.

Then, a few months later we heard something else. We were told that

this drow cleric didn't worship the spider bitch, but that she had

turned to good. We laughed, knowing that was impossible. Some of us

even raised a mug to this mysterious priestess for being clever enough

to disguise herself as a weak servant of good in order to prowl the

surface freely.

More time passed and we heard more stories. The priestess had moved

to that surface town above and was going to live there. What's more,

from the sound of things she really did follow the cursed one. Of

course, most of us didn't believe it. I sure didn't.

Then the war came. We were eager to go fight by the side of the

Silent One, hoping to finally take revenge on those who had thrown or

chased us out of our homes. We were very disappointed when he left

without us, leaving us to guard the lower tunnels of this mine. It

was fun, however. Lots of foolish humans and dwarves died by our

hands during the battles that followed."

Again Jax pauses, looking at the wall behind you. "Then…. then

something happened that I couldn't believe. More tales started to

come to our ears, tales about a battle which had been fought on the

surface. Tales which prominently featured a drow cleric fighting

alongside the forces defending the city. Still, some did not believe.

But then something else happened. The cleric had a name now. A name

I recognized. Ariessus Jarsali."

Another pause as your brother struggles to keep his emotions under

control. "The Stalkers know my family name. What was worse, in a

moment of drunken foolishness I had told some about our family. The

fact that the good cleric above was my sister spread like wildfire

through the ranks. Suddenly those I had thought my allies didn't want

to go out on patrol with me. They didn't want to stand watch with me.

I was tainted. YOU tainted me! You almost caused me to loose the

only thing in my life that mattered to me!"

He is screaming at the end, pacing back and forth like some caged

beast. His hand is clenched around the hilt of his sword and for a

moment you wonder if he is going to attack you. Out of the corner of

your eye you see that K'harn has positioned herself behind Jax. She

looks ready to pounce. With obvious effort Jax calms himself down

once again.

"It still isn't the same. They still don't trust me. I have tried so

hard over the past few months to prove to them that I am free of

whatever flaw exists within you, whatever weakness drove you into the

arms of the Cursed One. I've made some progress, but I'm nowhere near

where I was before." He laughs bitterly, shaking his head. "One day

I'm on the verge of gaining command of my own jagun, the next I'm

lower than those who joined the Stalkers the day before. All because

of YOU and your damned weakness! And now, now it is going to be worse

than before. The Silent One said he would keep this quiet, but you

can't keep secrets from the Stalkers. They'll find out I'm here, if

they don't already know. How do you think that is going to look,

huh?"

"Jax, please, talk to me. I had to see you. Once I found out you

were here, nothing could have kept me away. I want to know everything

there is to know about you. What you have been doing, how you survived.

Everything."

"Everything? OK, here it is in a nutshell. Our family was killed. I

escaped. Later I fled into the Underdark where I was captured by

kenku slavers. I was rescued from the slavers by the Silent One, who

offered me the chance to join the Stalkers. For years and years I

slowly climbed my way upwards in the ranks of the Stalkers. Then, a

couple months ago, decades of work were wiped out in an instant when

it was discovered that my sister had become "good". That's just about

everything."

(You push a little more about how he escaped and he tells you the

following: )

"You remember Ganst, my friend in House Oquiani? Well, somehow the

Oquiani discovered what Mera was up to. The day before Aswadain

struck Ganst invited me to his house where his Matron Mother spoke

with me. She told me what was going to happen and offered me the

chance to live. I wanted to tell Father what was going to happen, but

once I agreed to her plan they imprisoned me deep within their

compound. The wanted to use me to accuse Aswadain of destroying our

house. There plan wouldn't work unless our house was destroyed. So

the day of the attack I was sitting in a damp room under the Oquiani

manor.

I'm not real clear on what happened next. My guess is Mera got wind

of what Oquiani was planning and ended up attacking them as well. I

heard the fighting but was unable to do anything about it. I hid

above the door and when a pair of Aswadain soldiers burst into my room

I dropped on them from above and killed them both. I took the uniform

off of one and managed to make it out of the manor in the confusion of

the battle.

I fled into the wilderness south of the city. I thought I was doing

pretty good for myself until I was captured by those cursed kenku.

After only a few days of freedom I was a prisoner again. I'm not sure

how long they had me. Like I said before, I was finally rescued by

the Silent One and given a chance to join the Stalkers."

Ariessus falls slient, unsure. Then in a voice even softer than the one she has been using- "Aren't you even a little curious about me?"

"What is there to know? You abandoned our people, rejected our

culture, defiled our beliefs. Oh, I don't care that you turned your

back on the spider bitch, I've done the same. But I've found older

gods, older DROW gods, not the gods of the weak surface elves. And

what's worse, you didn't turn to just any of the Cursed, you turned to

the One! Really, does anything else matter?"

Ari's emotions caromed out of control as her brother talked. She felt so many things as she listened to this man, this hardened bitter warrior who resembles not at all the brother she kept in her memories for so long. All trace of softness gone. Or perhaps it was never there. Perhaps it was just her childish imagination, a ridiculous need to be loved by someone she thought the world of.

As she looked on him, the anger and hatred? in his face, she slowly

replayed some of his words. Weakness. He called her weak. More than once. Sneered at her as he said it. Did he think his life was the only one that was harsh? Ari stood up from her place at the small table. She walked slowly towards her brother. When she stood in front of him, she looked him straight in the eye.

And slapped his face with all the strength in her small frame. "You dare call me weak? Do so again and I shall rip your black heart out and make you eat it. My life may not have been as difficult as your was but it *was* difficult! Do you know how long it has been since I have been in the presence of one of my own kind?! To speak my native language with someone who knows the proper inflections, the subtle movements of the body? How long have you been content in your place with the Stalkers? How long have you had friends that look the same as you? How long have you been able to stare at another and know, *know* that they understand how you think?!"

Jax's eyes widen in surprise when Ari slaps him. He wasn't expecting

that. As she gets into his face and starts yelling at him his back

goes rigid and he assumes what Ari belives is some kind of military

attention pose. He is so surprised about the slap that he misses most

of Ari's words.

"It's been YEARS for me Jax! Not even my mentor could do that for me. Do you think I haven't agonized over my choice? I had no one after the

bloodshed. Everyone running around screaming, people wanting to kill me...I ran as far away as I could. And I looked for you! You who were sworn to protect me! You were not there when I needed you most! He was! He found me, took me in, made sure House Aswadain couldn't kill me. And the price? Nothing but to listen to his teachings."

Something crosses Jax's face when Ari mentions his duty to protect

her. Remose, perhaps? But, no, that would be "weak".

Ari backed up one step, then another. Her hand rubbed her forehead, the

memories crowding in. "At first, I resisted. This wasn't my way. I wanted only revenge. Still do." Her voice hardens. "And I will have it!"

As Ari backs off Jax relaxes a bit as well, he reaches up and touches

his cheek. To Ari's surprise she sees that she has spilt his lip

slightly, and that a small trickle of blood is rolling down from the

corner of his mouth. When he sees his blood on his hand Jax smiles.

"So, there IS a little of that hot-headed little brat in there that I

knew years ago."

Ari tries to surpress a smile. "There is more than 'a little'. I

just try to keep it from showing." She steps forward again and calls an

orison to mind. Gently she touchs his lip and sooths the cut away.

Still unsure about who Ari blames he looks away from his sister and

asks "Revenge. On who?"

"Merra of course. Who did you think I meant? She was the one who

caused House Jarsali's downfall. I will make her pay with her life." Her tone has taken on the hard edge that it had lost moments ago.

Jax nods, a brief look of relief flashing across his face.

After a moment, "But he showed me how different my life could be. No more killing just for the sake of it. Doing things that I disgusted all for Her. In Her name." Ari pauses, letting the silence lengthen. "If you must know the truth, my turning - it is partly Her own fault. Our family was dead- Mother turned into that creature.." Ari's head turns to look back into her brother's eyes. "Do you know about that? About what Mother has become?"

Confusion and uncertainty cross Jax's face in quick succession. "I

was told she was killed during a ceremony - that a handmaiden had

appeared and killed her."

"Who told you that?" Ari's eyes narrow. What do you know of the

Tests? Of what happened that day."

"Matron Oquiani told me that... why?"

She looks away, then back. "Mother is a drider." Jax's sister states it matter of factly, with no emotion whatsoever. "And House Oquiani. Was it completly destroyed by Aswadain ?"

Jax grows pale when he learns of his mother's true fate. "They...

she... how...?" He slowly shakes his head back and forth, trying to

come to terms with the revelation. After a few moments he seems to

finally find a handle. "Well, I guess it doesn't really matter who

did it, does it? In the end there is only one entity powerful and

perverted enough to turn a drow into a drider - the spider bitch.

Well, I guess that gives me one more reason to fight her, doesn't it.

As for the Oquiani, yes, as far as I know they were destroyed.

Remember, I escaped during the attack and wasn't about to stick around

to find out who the eventual winner was. But the place that I hid in

after the attack was known go Ganst. Had his family won I'm sure he

would have come looking for me."

"She let it all happen. She *made* it happen. Why then, should I let Her control my life any longer? What I was disgusted me. It took a few years, but I listened to Corellon's priest and I learned everything I could from him. And I took His oath binding me to Him because he made my life complete again. And I don't regret it. I have never regretted it. You don't understand anything I am saying, I can see it in your eyes. All you know is I follow someone you can never understand. I don't like killing Jax, I do it as little as possible."

Jax is still confused by the conflicts he perceives in Ari's words.

So he turns to what he knows. "You don't have to turn to the surface

powers, Ari. There are other powers in the Underdark, powers that

know the drow! They can help you! They were with our people long

before She sank her fangs into us, poisoning our souls. Before her we

were a race of honorable warriors." As he continues speaking Ari can

see that he is truly excited about this. "And we can be that again!

Strong, deadly, and yet honorable at the same time. There is no

weakness, only strength. None of the petty politics and backstabbing

that She demands. Only battle, glorious battle! You could turn to

them too, Ari! They could help you, help US take our revenge!"

Not knowing what to say, Ari starts then stops..then starts again.

"I am glad to hear you no longer follow her either. But battle Jax? I can not stand fighting and killing. It all feels so wrong to me when I must engage in combat. That is not where my soul lies." She bites her lower lip. "No politics. No weakness. That sounds so alluring."

"At what price would they exact from us for helping us to defeat

our enemies though?"

Jax shrugs, as if it is a little thing. "The same thing all Powers

demand of us mortals - our worship. The Silent One explained to me

once that the Powers derive much of their power from us mortals.

Ironic, isn't it? Without us, without our devotion and faith their

powers waver. The Snake was once very powerful, back when our people

worshiped the spirits. When the Spider bitch took over he and the

other powers decreased. Now he is slowly, carefully rebuilding his

power base. It is a cycle which cannot be stopped. We, his faithful,

give our devotion to him. He grows more powerful, attracting more

faithful who in turn make him more powerful."

"And I can't help the way others treat you. Despite what you say, it is

*not* my fault that your friends can't see you for what you are. That you haven't changed. But then, what do I know? To me you *have* changed. You used to be someone I could look up to. Now you are nothing more than a killer, by your own admission. You scorn what I have become. You mock me for following the path of good. Well it is what I AM. I am a good person. No matter who thinks otherwise."

Jax frowns, seeing that he isn't getting through. "It's not about...

"good" and "evil". One thing that I have learned is that every race

has their own definations for those concepts. And even among a race

their ideas differ widely. No, it is about honor and justice! That

is what our people lack, what She has taken from us. Am I a killer?

Yes, I kill. I am a soldier, and a good one. But I am not an

assassin. I am not a drow out hunting other creatures for sport. I

kill because violence is the ultimate solution, and there are some

problems out there that demand a violent end."

As Jax speaks Ari can't help but wonder where these ideas have come

from. Sure, the drow speak of things like "honor", but they are

hollow words. But Jax seems to believe in those words now

Her healer's soul cries out at Jax's theories about violence. She

looks to her own past with the Seekers and wonders how many times they killed because it was the only solution that they could find. Ari shakes her head.

No, she won't be drawn into this discussion. It only gives her a

headache trying to vocalize what she feels is right and wrong. And sometimes what you think is right, doesn't sound all that good when put in words.

"I'm not getting into this with you. Suffice it to say that I do

not beleive that violence is the ultimate solution.

"So, what is the ultimate solution then? What ideal, what philosophy

can we follow that teaches us how to resolve conflicts successfully

within our world?"

"I have had to fight for my position in the town's society. I had to fight in a damn war to make them see me for what and who I am. Not a drow who wants to wander the town and kill all in their sleep. But a woman who wants nothing more then do be allowed to do what she loves best. To heal.

Jax nods. "Yes, tales of your healing skills have come to us as well.

Berithia spoke of you."

The name Berithia seems familiar, somehow associated with Laila's, but

you can't put a finger on where you have heard it.

"And Berithia would be?"

"Berithia? One of our healers. Oh, that's right, she was in disguise

while on the surface. She looked like a surface elf while up there."

As Jax tells you this the image of one of Laila's students comes to

mind, a haughty elf with flowing brown hair. Now that you think of

it, you do remember her looking at you in an almost challenging way

several times. You had dismissed it to student jealousy - you are,

after all, one of Laila's favorites. But now you wonder if perhaps

those looks had a more sinister motivation.

"You think your life hard, yes I never had to live as a slave, and if I

thought you would take it my sympathies I would give you. Have you ever

been raped Jax? Tortured so badly you passed out only to be woken to have it happen again? Have you been thrown in a prison because you walked into a town and someone saw you as different?"

Once again that same look of remorse flashes across Jax's face. Could

he, perhaps feel bad? It would at lest be a start.

"I have not had an easy time of it, but I have found people who care for me despite what I look like. And it is because of Him. He is one of the reasons that my friends can look upon me and know that I will never do them harm."

But at the mention of Corellon and the Truth Seekers Jax's expression

hardens once again.

"Don't give me that look. You have your opinions and I have mine."

Jax spreads his hand out, and bows his head slightly. It's a

traditional drow sign for "I give in". But the fact that he holds his

palms down, not up, indicates that he belives this particular subject

hasn't been resolved. It is kind of a "... for now" addition to the

"I give in".

The drow cleric sits back down, her hands folding one upon the other on

the table before her. "Sit, please. I'm tired of looking up at you."

Jax looks at the chair as if trying to decide what to do. He glances

behind him and his eyes widen. K'harn apparently grew to her large

size when Ari slapped her brother. Jax is more than a little unnerved

to realize he's had a great cat at his back for the past several

minutes. Still, he does finally take a seat.

Now, Ari smiles a little wickedly as she see her brother look at

her bond. "How remiss of me. I did not introduce you to my companion. Jax meet K'harn."

Jax eyes K'harn curiously. "So, you really do have a Stone Stalker

wandering around with you." He seems about to say more, but stops and

just shrugs.

Again, she falls silent and lets it lengthen. "You stated that I

abandoned our people, rejected our culture, defiled our beliefs. Not so. Our people abandoned me. By slaughtering our House, I was left alone. I could not go to another. Who would have taken me in? No one."

"The Stalkers would have taken you in. There are others, like us, who

would have done the same. Even Ellistrae would have been better for

you. At least she is still drow."

"The Stalkers. I doubt that. You said yourself you thought me weak.

What would they have thought of me? More than likely that would have

killed me as well."

Jax chuckles. "Oh no. They wouldn't dare lay a hand on you. The

Silent One has forbidden it. You could walk into their camp and

insult them until you fainted from exhaustion and they would not harm

you.

But you are correct, the Stalkers wouldn't take you in now. What I

meant was when you initially fled and were alone in the Underdark - if

the Seekers had found you then you would probably be a much different

person. We weren't all that unlike as we were growing up."

"And please...don't speak to me of Ellistrae. I know one of her

followers. I get enough about her from him." Then Ari pauses, puzzled. "You know that she does not follow in her mother's footsteps any longer. You would have me follow her, yet frown upon Corellon. Is it only because I do not follow a drow diety that all of you find me 'warped'? How rude."

"Even though the Dark Dancer no longer follows her mother's ways she

is still one of us, part of our culture and heritage. He is the

antithesis of our people. He drove us underground, abandoning us to

Her evil ways. Did He try to save us then? No! He drove us from the

light, disgusted by our weakness, unable to see beyond the veil She

had pulled over our and His eyes."

"As for our culture, it is still very ingrained into me. I still have

problems at times dealing with males on the surface. The males in the party I adventure with could use a good lesson in the drow way. Yet I can not teach them their place. They are not drow. I still find myself, however, frustrated and angry more often than not at things they do or say. I am still drow and it is difficult for me to let a male stay in charge. Do not ask why I do so. Just know that for now, I am content to let it stand as it is."

"Our beliefs. What do you want me to believe Jax? What do you want me to say about that?"

"I understand why you have turned your back on them, Ariessus" he

replies, using your full name for the first time. "I have turned my

back on them as well. What I don't understand is why you turned to

where you turned. But... I guess it would have been hard on you after

the House was destroyed. You would have been confused, vulnerable.

Yes. And that's when this one you speak of found you and was able to

take advantage of your state. Surely even you don't believe that you

would have listened to him if you hadn't been lost and alone?"

Offended, "Take advantage of me? You have no idea how insulting

you are do you? No one takes advantage of me. I told you, he demanded nothing of me. It took me a good number of years to choose Corellon. I had plenty of time to make my decision."

Again Jax lowers his head and spreads his arms. Again you notice the

palms facing down.

"These gods that you follow now, explain how you think they are better than what I have found. You said you no longer let Her rule over you. Is the deity you follow now any better?"

Jax leans forward. "The powers I follow now are ancient powers, older

than Her. Well, maybe. Anyway, long, long ago when our race was

first born we worshiped powers who presented themselves to us as

animal totems. Our race has always been a race of warriors, and we

worshiped those animals who hunted, from the bear to the panther, from

the snake to the falcon. And yes, even the spider. Those powers

fostered the spirit of our people and made us strong. But then one

betrayed our trust. I have yet to hear how She overthrew the other

powers, but somehow she did, managing to even turn our people against

those who had given them so much. But even in that dark time there

were those who remained loyal to the first powers. Throughout the

millenia they have formed small bands on the fringes of drow society,

often living in wilds of the Underdark to survive. The Dark Stalkers

were formed around the seed of one of those small groups. We worship

the Snake, and he gives us strength. He teaches us that honor is more

important than power, that the spirit must be strong before the body

can be triumphant."

Jax stops, looking at your face, wondering if he is getting through or

not.

Sighing, "This is all so much. I never knew of these dieties

Jax." She raises from her chair and paces the room. "Before today I have never felt that I had abandoned my heritage. I am drow, there is no denying that. But now you tell me there are other gods the drow can worship. Gods that look like us, that know who we are. And you make me wonder, if I had known would I have turned to one of them?" Depsite her earlier words of not being taken advantage of, insidious doubts begin to creep in. "Tell me more. Tell me their names."

"In the beginning they were called by what they are - the spirit of

the Snake. The spirit of the Bear. This is ancient, ancient history,

back when our people were more like the wild elves that today live in

the forests above. Perhaps they had name. Perhaps not. I don't

know. Perhaps one of our shamans could tell you more. But I can tell

you this - the Spirits were not evil, they were not vindictive, they

did not pit family against family for their own warped pleasure. They

were like us then, simple and basic. Each one did have their own

"theme" if you will. The bear symbolized and therefore emphasized

strength. The panther was grace. The falcon was speed. The snake

was wisdom. The spider... well, she started out symbolizing stealth.

Then the spider betrayed both us and the other spirits. Over

centuries she perverted her followers, a small sect of female shamans.

She turned them to evil, introducing them to the darker powers of the

nether realms. The females made pacts with the dark ones, pacts which

gave them great power, but at the price of their souls. Those females

then began to poison the soul of our people. The other shamans tried

to stop them, but they realized the danger too late. The followers of

the Spider bitch started a holy war, and somehow convinced most of our

people to follow them. Most of the shaman were slain. A few escaped

into the wilderness. Then the Bitch's aim proved further than her

reach when she tried to spread the war among the other races of elves.

That's when your God intervened.

You are a healer. Tell me something. If my arm was horribly

infected, what would you do? Would you cut off my arm to save my

life? Or would you simply decide I wasn't worth saving and so kill me

to stop the spread of the disease? That is what your God did.

Instead of purging our race of those that had poisoned it he condemned

all of us to death. The surface elves hunted our people unmercifully,

eventually driving them into the Underdark, where She had sole hold

over their way of life. Our own histories tell us what happened then.

But during the millennia that the drow were underground there were

still scattered pockets of drow on the surface, drow who still

worshiped the Old Powers. Of course, they had to remain hidden from

the surface elves. After all, to have dark skin meant one would be

killed on sight. And Corelleon's curse was so strong, so blindly

applied that even those who still followed the older powers were

darkened.

But, as we were talking about before, the Powers derive their power

from the worship of mortals. Without many mortals worshiping them the

spirit powers became weak. Some of them, I believe, died - if a

spirit can die. I know of only two that still survive - the Snake and

the Panther. The Snake has become popular among the mercenary

companies of the Underdark. The Panther still rules under the night

sky above."

Jax pauses here to see if you have any questions.

Finally Ariessus runs out of words. She looks across at him, waiting to

see what he will do next. It occurs to her that she should tell him about that cursed bard's song that is currently sweeping the town. Would he ever hear it down her? He'd be even more angry if he did. She should warn him. Why? So that he may berate her even more? Tell her she is even more warped than he already thinks she is because she was in love with a human? A paladin at that? Her lower lip is caught between her teeth as she tries to think it through.